An Update for August
As well as some words on transitioning through liminal spaces, working with the Greek Goddess Hekate, and testing my fear of snakes
Hello, friends– it’s August!
I hope your summer has been exactly what you’ve been needing it to be: whether it’s seeking travel and adventure, allowing time for self care and leisurely activities, embracing the high energy/ramped up/ social butterfly/ fluttering about-ness, or anything in between! I’ve definitely been overwhelmed with the fast-paced summer energy of the past two weeks but I’m finally home and able to settle into a work groove again.
I wanted to write an update for friends and family regarding our move to Ireland and decided I’d take my art doula’s advice and lean into flexibility during this busy time of year, so here it is. I’m publishing this update as part of my week 9 of 52 writing assignment, as well as some personal insights as I transition from a place of planning and preparation into the unknown of what lies ahead once I set foot in a different country. It’s hard to believe I’ve made it to week 9, but here I am! Thank you for your continued support and I hope we all have a great week and get through today’s full supermoon!
An update on our big move:
I can’t believe it, but my husband and I have finally entered into the last leg of preparation for our big move to Ireland! Aaagghhhh, it’s finally happening! It’s been a long road to making this dream come true ( Has it been a year or a lifetime in the making? Who knows? Time is weird) but we’ve come full circle in a way– we boarded our plane home after our month-long visit to Ireland last summer at the end of August and we’ll be boarding our plane to relocate there permanently on August 28th. The countdown has started– only 27 more days! (Please excuse me while I go hyperventilate into a paper bag. LOL)
Of all the various stressful aspects of this past year (living in limbo while our house was on the market, downsizing our 3 bedroom home into just a few suitcases and boxes, moving into our home for the summer, and so much research and preparation for the move itself), the pet transport and travel logistics have been weighing on me the most so far. We would greatly welcome any prayers, kind thoughts, good vibes, etc you’d like to send our way for a smooth, safe, and efficient day of travel for us, but more importantly for Mango and Molly Malone. Fingers crossed and ALL the Gods willing we get there with minimal challenges!
Now that our departure date is scheduled, we’re starting to soak up as much quality time with loved ones as we can get. We’re planning to have a Bon Voyage gathering on August 13th (most likely at Cook Park in Tigard, OR), so please keep a lookout for more details coming soon, hopefully within the next few days! We’re looking forward to a leisurely hang in a park or by a body of water, so pull out your Hawaiian attire in honor of Martin (that’s all my Irish husband wears!) and please plan to bring your own chair/snacks/drinks. We are traveling extremely lightly, so in lieu of goodbye gifts, we’d love nothing more than for you to just gift us your time and hugs! Can’t wait to see you!
Some words on transitioning through liminal spaces and testing fear:
Living in limbo, without an end date in sight, has been the biggest challenge of this past year. Upon our return home from Ireland last summer, we immediately found a realtor and put our house up for sale, hoping to ride the coattails of a booming pandemic housing market and sell fast. We originally listed in October but the fall/winter/spring markets in rural Oregon were slow and we didn’t actually sell our house until July. Last autumn, when uncertainty became relentless and we were struggling to find the best path forward, I leaned into a curiosity about the Greek goddess Hekate, started reading about her, and began to turn to her for guidance.
I had originally heard of Hekate as The Goddess of Witches and Dark Mother, but after some quick research I learned that she is also known as the Keeper of the Keys, Guardian of the Gates, and She Who Frequents the Crossroads. Straddling my own threshold between worlds with one foot here in the present (the US) and one foot in the future (Ireland), I was immediately intrigued and felt called to delve deeper.
I started by dedicating a moon & stars journal (she is also known as Goddess of the Dark Moon) and the Magickal Herb Oracle deck to communicating with her directly. I adorned an altar I made for her with pomegranates and made her detailed collages as offerings. I began to pay more attention to the animals she is associated with, such as dogs, which I have (she is known as the Leader of the Dogs), the serpent, which I am intensely adverse to (she is seen holding a snake in most of her three form depictions), and the owl, which I already had a tattoo of as part of honoring my mother’s passing (owls are known to help guide souls to the Afterlife, and Hekate is considered to chaperone Persephone to and from the Underworld).
One of the first things I resonated with is her ruling the domain of magical and medicinal plants. I continued my work with her by tending the garden I had built two summers before and drinking tea made with lavender, chamomile, mugwort, and honey. With one of her symbols being the snake, it made sense when I soon found one living in my backyard. I tried really hard to set my deep fear of snakes aside, hoping it would keep the mice and rats out of the garden and away from the house.
Now, if you know me personally, you know that this fear has been with me my entire life. I’m not exactly sure where the phobia came from (Was it even one specific experience? Maybe it was brought with me from a past life?), but the fear itself can be quite dramatic and embarrassing. I mean, what kind of preschool and Kindergarten teacher couldn’t look at books with kids that had snakes in them (and threw them across the room!), or had to leave the classroom when someone brought their pet boa in for show and tell in a pillowcase, let alone got nauseous when visiting another classroom that had corn snakes for pets? Me– that would be me! My friends and their kiddos now use the word “squiggles” so that voice command and internet memory don’t bombard me with photos and videos that I didn’t give my consent to see.
I was chatting with a friend about my fear a few years ago and she told me about how some women were strangled by boa constrictors during the witch trials and wondered if maybe I was one of them. I know I come from a long line of witches, one of them even being traced back to the witch trial times, but I’m not sure if any of them were strangled by snakes. Ugh, I don’t think I’d even want to know— how terrifying!
One of the aspects of living with a pond in our backyard is the ever present wildlife, squiggles included. I first saw a small one at the beginning of summer during my daily round of “Puppy Poo Poo Pick-Up Patrol” and have been on high alert since, always looking down and around for them first, poo piles second. I saw another (or the same one?) yesterday and immediately got a whole-body flight reaction upon seeing it slither away from my direction. I quickly backed away, almost across the lawn and heading for the slider door when something stopped me.
I considered this a nod from Hekate herself and remembered that snakes often symbolize transformation. I took a deep breath and decided to stay curious and test my fear a little. (Sorry I can’t provide any more info on the symbolization for you– again, thanks to internet memory) I wanted to see how close I could get and maybe how comfortable I could get while looking at it. I slowly stepped toward its direction, waiting until I could see it. I stepped closer again and stopped about 8 feet away. I noticed its dark greenish gray body and the light gray stripe down its back. It was about 12 inches long. I watched it as it looked in my direction and slowly serpentined away toward the fenceline. I felt another head to toe body chill watching it slide through the grass so I looked away for a few seconds. It’s so creepy— it doesn’t even have legs! (Even the act of writing this is a challenge and I had to stop for a break.)
After calming down again, I felt proud of myself for doing something this hard and decided I could look at it again. I felt a kind of respect for it and acknowledged how some people think it's beautiful. I took another step closer and that’s when movement in a patch of shade to the right of it caught my eye. A second one about 10 inches long! I panicked and turned for the door. Nope, I was not doing this anymore! This was my limit– two was two too many! I’m not exactly sure what two snakes resemble, maybe that both my husband and I are in transition, or maybe that we’re embarking on a new chapter together? Maybe we need to work on grounding ourselves during this stressful time of transition?
I came back inside, cleared off my project desk, and began to write. I wanted some additional insight around this transitory time and the move abroad, so I pulled 3 cards. The first card came from the Magickal Herb oracle I dedicated to working with Hekate. The Reflection card popped out after only 2 shuffles. It represents success, balancing, and moon magic– perfect for the full moon! Hekate’s message reminded me to reflect on all that has gone before and to find gratitude for the blessings and challenges that have helped my evolution in arriving at this moment. I must listen to my inner truth and intuition as the details of the path forward may be hard to see, but to ultimately know that I’m being guided with great wisdom.
I pulled the second card from the How to be a Moonflower deck and a bright garden snake popped out! Ahhhh, another surge of flight response and I almost threw it across the room but forced myself to hold it by the very edge of the corner instead. I turned it over to read the message: RELEASE FEAR. You’ve gotta be freaking kidding me! I couldn’t make this up if I wanted to! I love pulling cards for this exact reason– I always find the message I’m most needing to hear or get validation on things I’ve been working on.
Lastly, I pulled the last card for guidance on our move to Ireland, so I reached for my favorite deck of all time, The Fairies’ Oracle. I’ve had this deck for over 20 years and I love it so much– Brian Froud’s artwork is spectacular and Jessica Macbeth’s interpretations always give me the best insight. The card that came out upside down was The Rarr and it usually indicates a terrible problem. Oh, great… It can represent a time of turmoil or losing control, almost like the feeling of thrashing about in midair. (Yes, I’ve been in a frenzy trying to organize and work out logistics) Faery glamour is running wild and illusions and delusions are rife and misunderstandings escalate. A cold shower is in order– stat! I am reminded to meditate, practice grounding exercises, and to take a step back to reassess and take another look at things. Hello, squiggles!